by Archie M. Richards, Jr., CFP^®
May 9, 2005

Treat Terri Schiavo's death as an opportunity for your family. Prepare an estate plan and discuss it at family gatherings. Important issues can be resolved in a social setting.

Just talking around the kitchen table will do. But a neutral place might be best, especially if your children live elsewhere or if members of your extended family are included. An expensive retreat isn't necessary, but using a special location makes the participants treat the meeting as special.

Promote your money values and educate your family members about money matters.

Ask your heirs to record which of the family heirlooms they'd like. Several may record the same item. Allocate the items later as equitably as you can, not in your will, but in a memorandum to which the will refers. (Amending a will is cumbersome; changing a memorandum is not.)

Explain who will take charge of you and your money in the event of your disability.

Tell your family how much medical care you want if you're unable to communicate your wishes. Discuss who should be named in a health care proxy to make the decisions for you.

If you have long-term care insurance, explain how it works. If you don't have the insurance, discuss how your long-term care will be paid for.

Explain your preferences for a funeral and burial.

Discuss your philanthropic interests. The other members of the family needn't have the same interests, but they should know yours.

Allay any concerns among your heirs about being kept out of the loop. Nothing destroys a family more than feuding over an inheritance.

If you own a business, explain its condition and prospects. You may prefer that a member of your family own and manage the business after your retirement or disability. It shouldn't necessarily be the oldest child. It shouldn't necessarily be a male child. It should be the person who has the most talent in running the business and the greatest interest in doing so.

That person should probably be given majority control. No business can thrive if the person who has the talent, experience, and interest to run it must obtain business-strategy approval from syblings who have less talent, experience, and interest and whose primary interest may be their dividend checks.

If the bulk of your assets are tied up in the business, and one of your children is given majority control, the others may feel left out. Explain why unequal distribution may be necessary. What can be done to keep the others in the loop? Talk about it - in advance.

Explain that your will has no effect on the inheritance of property held in joint tenancies.

Explain that your will has no effect on the inheritance of property held in IRAs.

Oh, you weren't aware of those last two items? Maybe you'd better get cracking about an estate plan.

If you have a living trust, which you probably should, outline its provisions. (See the column dated 7/26/04 in www.archierichards.com.)

Pay attention to feedback from your family and refine your estate plan accordingly.

Some people consider death so abhorrent that they're reluctant to discuss these matters. I'm with you: Dying is the worst. But the second worst thing is leaving behind conditions that lead to a family feud. Believe it or not, members of your family will be upset when you die. If your estate plan is inadequate, people who are already upset may start fighting. Other than your passing, what could be worse?

Make the gatherings inclusive. The spouses of your children should of course be included. So should grandchildren who are old enough. If your estate is complex or involves many people, consider hiring a certified financial planner to run the meeting.

Family gatherings are a vital ingredient in estate planning.

Federal debt held by the public in March 2005 was 39 percent of the Gross Domestic Product. This seems like a lot. But in 1993, federal debt was 49 percent of the GDP. The stock market rose nicely then, and that's exactly what it's going to do now.